“Don’t be helpful, be harmless” is a very safe way to live because being helpful (or attempting to be helpful) often causes friction. But does this mean we should cease trying to be helpful? Yes. And no.
Part of maturity is recognizing when we need to speak and when we need to be silent. A 5-year-old might not realize that pointing out a defect on someone’s face is inappropriate. A 30-year-old usually knows the importance of keeping silent about that giant pimple.
Spiritual maturity is recognizing that only the Lord knows when a person is ready to receive a certain message. We must constantly seek his guidance and walk in accordance with his spirit.
The parable of the sower teaches us that sowing when and where the ground is not ready to receive the seed results in waste. We may think our words are needed when they aren’t. We may think the listener is ready to hear when they aren’t. Christ said, “Do not throw your pearls before pigs, lest they trample them underfoot and turn to attack you.” Our words, when the hearer is not in a place to receive them, can do more harm than good. And sometimes the harm is actually to ourselves.
This does not mean that if we receive a negative reaction to something we said, we probably shouldn’t have said it. Actually, the opposite is true. Sometimes, God tells us to speak regardless of whether or not our message will be received the way we intended. The voices of the prophets were seldom welcome. They were misunderstood, criticized, ignored, mocked, even abused. But they continued to speak because they knew that obedience to the Lord was more important than what their neighbors thought about them.
“Love does not harm to it’s neighbor.” Sometimes the most harmful thing is doing and saying nothing.
“All that is necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing.”
