Who wouldn’t love a sit-com/movie with the happy ending life? Sadly, it seems that many people actually think this sort of life is not only possible but that it is and should be the goal of every person—as if there is an “easy” button somewhere, and that if one works or prays hard enough they will find it. Maybe this is why it is difficult for so many in our society to feel accepted or to accept the fact that life isn’t “perfect.”
I have a friend who is dealing with some non life-threatening, but still serious health issues. There have been several times in the past few months where she has called me, crying, so frustrated with her situation because she feels she can’t lead a “normal” life—and she feels embarrassed.
I have another friend who is battling cancer for the second time. She has already lost her daughter to the disease, and has watched her mother, her sister, and now her 29-year old nephew fight the “C” word. Even after everything she has been through, my dear friend often feels guilty for not being able to “keep up” with “normal” people.
Last year I took a tumble and landed chin-first on concrete. I injured my neck and had to deal with some life-altering pain for about a year. After a few months I became so discouraged. I remember thinking, “all I want is to be able to make it through a day like a ‘normal’ person.” The whole situation was embarrassing.
The fact is, for most of the world poverty, famine, persecution, war, chronic pain, debilitating illnesses, and life-threatening diseases ARE reality—”normal.” Why should anyone feel embarrassed about things they can’t control?
This year I discovered something that I am doing my best to live by: acceptance of reality. There is something liberating about simply accepting things the way they are. Not everything can be “fixed” or changed or made “perfect.”
Life is what it is. Things happen. People lose their jobs, or get sick, and sometimes there isn’t anything that can be done to “fix” it or make it “right.”
Our question should not always be how to escape, fix, or ignore difficulties (they are part of life), but how to accept and to deal with them. The apostle said he had learned the “secret” of being content in any and every circumstance. I’m pretty sure this didn’t mean he felt happy or even FELT content all the time (remember, the same apostle also mentioned he became so discouraged once that he felt “a sentence of death” in himself and even “despaired of life”). Even the Savior experienced such anguish of spirit that He began sweating blood! The contentment the apostle was referring to had nothing to do with human emotions or feelings. True contentment has everything to do with faith.
“Faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.” Hebrews 11:1
It is faith that enables us to endure the not-so-fun realities of life. Faith isn’t blind; it does not ignore reality or pretend not to “feel” pain. It stares reality in the face and says, “Yes, this is difficult, I have to accept that. But I know Who holds me in His hand and won’t let me go.”
True faith (and contentment) is present even when the “feelings” of faith (and contentment) are not. There have been many times in my life when I felt nothing. Yet, somehow I was kept. “When we are faithless, He is faithful.”
I am so sorry to see my friends suffering the way they are . . . I wish I could change their current reality. But we’re in a “waiting room” here. As Peter said, “according to His promise we are looking for new heavens and a new earth, in which righteousness dwells” (2 Peter 3:13). Someday, everything will be “right.” In the meantime, our “outer man” will decay—one way or another. But at the same time, our “inner man is being renewed day by day.”
Maybe this knowledge is what enabled the apostle to say he was “content” and that he considered his sufferings—the countless beatings and imprisonments, “light and momentary afflictions.”
“For momentary, light affliction is producing for us an eternal weight of glory far beyond all comparison, while we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen; for the things which are seen are temporal, but the things which are not seen are eternal.” 2 Corinthian 4:17-18
“Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.” ~2 Corinthians 12:10
Love to all,
Stephanie
www.stephaniestaples.com
1 Comment. Leave new
Thanks Stephanie for this encouraging note. As one who daily struggles to “triumph over” Fibromyalgia, I recently had a set back when I fell down the stairs and broke my foot, sprained my ankle and perhaps tore ligaments in both my knee and shoulder. It is scriptures such as you have referred to that get me through the daily struggles, but even so, I often find myself sucked into depression, frustration, anxiety, and embarrasment as you referenced. While many have related to the depression, frustration, etc.in articles such as yours, few have related to the embarrassment that we often feel when dealing with our “norm”. The reminder that, for so many, suffering is the norm and that it is precisely to these that Paul writes, helps me to unload this unexplainable feeling of shame and embarrassment. I’ll hold my head up high today as I struggle up the steps to church choir and lean on my silly, but chicly designed cane. Feelings are real, but faith is not based on feeling, as you state. God’s word sustains us, lifts us up, and helps us rise above this “temporary” state of suffering while on this earth. Thanks for helping me rise above another day of this “not so perfect life”, to remain ever so joyful in the Lord. I’m smiling through the pain:) Even so, may we remain compassionate, caring and understanding of our fellow sufferers and offer the same encouragement as we so often need.